"March of the Penguins"

"Penguins in Tuxedos for the Oscars"

By BonnieBlueFlag

Dear Hollywood Moguls and Elites:

For months we have heard the weeping, and wailing, and the gnashing of teeth emanating from the enclaves of Hollywood movie makers, and theater owners all across America. Box office receipts have "mysteriously" plummeted to record depths, and they don't know why.

Convinced that the audiences were only interested in big special effects movies, believing that the masses would not be able to understand a complex story plot, and constantly reassuring each other that XXX rated movies were the way to go; they were baffled when their personal fortunes no longer seemed guaranteed by the dreck they were producing.

And now here comes a little "French" documentary about Penguins, French for heaven's sake, that looks like it is going to be this year's proverbial "Cash Cow."

"The March of the Penguins" is expected to surpass the $21.6 million in earnings of the number 2 documentary, Michael Moore's "Bowling for Columbine," which should have been classified as a work of fiction.

Whatever the ultimate earnings are, including the home video versions, and other product revenues, there will be no enormous outlay for the salaries and demands of the "stars." There was no Scientology tent set up on location while filming.

What will be the reaction of those in the world of entertainment? Will they huddle together and decide this film is a fluke? That it is not be taken seriously as an indication, that the American audiences are no longer willing to be taken to the depths of pornographic voyeurism?

They were wrong about Mel Gibson's "Passion of the Christ," forcing him to earn all those millions of dollars, all by himself. It is my understanding, that he already has distribution offers and contracts for his next movie, which is still on the drawing board. Mel had the character to take an unpopular stand in Hollywood, and he has been richly rewarded.

"The March of the Penguins," follows the life cycle and the family life of the Emperor Penguins who live in Antarctica, the South Pole. In other words, this is a film about "Family Values." Incidentally, there are no penguins at the North Pole with Santa and the reindeer.

For those of you who may be reluctant to see a French documentary, perhaps unwilling to be perceived as being like the French in any way, I give you the following loophole.

The original French version had the penguins speaking their own parts, similar to a live animation, which did not do well in the U.S.

So with a snip of the scissors, and the addition of a voice over by Morgan Freeman, voila, an American hit! March of the Penguins

Written by: BonnieBlueFlag