Ultima Thule

In ancient times the northernmost region of the habitable world - hence, any distant, unknown or mysterious land.

Monday, June 13, 2005

The future war on terror

By Aussiegirl

This excruciating sensitivity over the handling of the Koran is best handled with deft satire, wonderfully rendered on
Tech Central Station by Douglas Kern:

And So the Kinder, Gentler War on Terror Began...

"Men," growled Colonel Clueless, "there's no denying it: the Guantanamo Bay Ex-Detainee Reunion Party has clearly violated several Baghdad municipal ordinances, what with the mortar attacks and sniper fire and car bombs and all, and serious action will have to be taken."

The other officers at the Battalion staff meeting whispered to each other nervously. A captain's hand shot into the air. "Sir, does this mean we can start shooting bullets now?"

"Absolutely not. I intend to conduct every phase of Operation Sitting Ducks with scrupulous adherence to the letter of the law. And as you know, gentlemen, we are pledged never to bring any harm whatsoever to even a single page of the Holy Koran."

"So -- what are we going to do, sir, about the 30-foot wall that the insurgents have built around their compound, composed of nothing except Korans stapled together?"

"First of all," hissed the Colonel, "they are not 'insurgents.' They are 'patriotic Iraqi protestors.' Second of all, their current residence is not a 'compound.' It is a mosque."...


At 9:19 AM, Blogger Billy D said...

Sadly, this satire has a ring of truth. Have you seen the government issued documents on the army rules for handling a Koran? Page after page of "don't touch it this way" and "place in plastic bag" while the very pieces of filth that bemoan our handling of their "holy book" use the Holy Bible for toilet paper.
Just very sad. Whoever told W we could fight a war and make people love us at the same time needs a beating.

At 12:30 PM, Blogger The Fly said...

I don't think it's so much an issue of trying to make them love us; it's more about being above reproach, because anything we do wrong is overblown and used against us.

Just look at Abu Ghraib. Yeah, it was absolutely unprofessional, and the perpetrators are being punished accordingly. Since then, how many car bombs, or man-mounted bombs, or raids against police stations have the terrorists carried out?

It's not so much about trying to get them to love us: it's about demonstrating our ideals, while simultaneously proving that while the terrorists are savages, we aren't.

I posted the same link, and thought it was absolutely poignant.

At 1:07 PM, Blogger Aussiegirl said...

Thanks for such great comments, guys, and thanks for visiting my blog -- just make yourselves right at home -- we are a friendly bunch over here. I finally got around to blogrolling both your sites which are very impressive.
As for the kinder, gentler war on terror, I have had it about up to here with this bending over backwards to be sensitive to the cultural needs of savages who blow innocent people up and who cut off the heads of blameless victims with a rusty knife while screaming the name of their infidel moon god. As for being above reproach - that is for Caesar's wife - and not the proper role of a military machine which is trying to destroy a murderous enemy. The rules at Gitmo are absolutely sickening if you heard Duncan Hunter on the Fox Sunday show -- we have to handle the Koran with sterile, white gloves, and are not even allowed to search that darn thing before it is passed to an inmate -- there are some crazy rules about a muslim standing by and turning some sample pages for the guard to observe before it is passed on. How many weapons and messages and other secret information can be passed this way? This is absolutely absurd. They get honey and dates to break their fast along with prayer beads, Korans, prayer mats, arrows painted to point their heads towards Mecca so they won't be sticking their behinds up in the air pointing the wrong way -- and this is the REAL kicker that just completely sickened me -- there are painted footprints on certain boards which SQUEAK -- so that these boards are not accidentally stepped on during prayers and unintentionally disturb the prayers of the murderous monsters praying to their murderous god. I'm all for humane treatment -- because we are civilized -- but this is nothing short of cultural and physical suicide.

And yes -- it takes "compassionate conservatism" too far. Let's imagine this happening in WWII -- and then think if we would have won. Imagine Patton doing this. We need more of him -- and less of this culturally sensitive bullhockey from our military.

Furthermore, as I read through the rules, I was struck by the poor grammar of the regulations - lots of articles missing -- like "the" -- now -- I am a speaker of a foreign language -- and one of the dead giveaways of a foreigner who is speaking or writing pretty good English is the use of articles - it's very subtle in English were we use them and where we don't. So my sense of having read these regulations is that they were written by a Muslim cleric -- probably working for the DOD -- as a chaplain - and we know that loads of these guys are plants from the Islamofacists. So we have the enemy, in essence, laying down the rules for us. Was there ever a more idiotic policy in the history of the world?


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